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The more that you show your personality, the more the other person gets an idea of what a relationship with you would be like. ”“We all want a flattering photo that peaks the maximum number of people’s interest.Go ahead and choose that picture, but recognize that it’s a slippery slope.Focus your attention and energy on those good characteristics you’re looking for and then you’ll start spotting singles who embody those traits everywhere you go.To avoid wasting your time and getting emotionally attached to someone who will never be The One, Spira recommends sharing your intentions right from the beginning.
Once you get clarity around your desires, which may require some self-reflection and sitting down with pen and paper, then start focusing on them.There is a temptation to create or communicate a [version of] you that, like an Instagram post, will garner the most likes.Do not contort yourself to fit what you presume others desire. Use Tinder to communicate what you actually desire, so you can find someone you truly like.”“We know it sounds counterintuitive, but you read this right.Plus, you have lots of wisdom and life experience under your belt, which means you know exactly what you want and don’t want in life and in a partner.(Well, mostly.) To help you navigate the dating scene in your 30s, we enlisted the help of two dating pros—Julie Spira, online dating expert and digital matchmaker, and offline dating coach Camille Virginia of Master Offline Dating—with different perspectives on playing the field.