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Anyway, it’s not easy for foreign men; we just have ridiculously low standards. Like I was on a date with this Japanese girl – this was a couple of years ago – and we went to a Mexican restaurant. And we were hitting it off, drinking Coronas and laughing and making flirty eyes and then out of nowhere, and bear in mind this was our first date, she asks, Things kind of degraded from there, and we never went out again.
Which is a shame, because I was kind of into that whole witch thing.
I moved here permanently in 2008, at which point I gave up eating cheeseburgers, wearing wrinkled t-shirts, and speaking English.
I first came to Japan in 2003, and started studying Japanese shortly thereafter.
What I see often seems unlike the Japan depicted in books and on the net, and sometimes I wonder, What country are these people talking about? Like so many interactions in Japan, things often start off promising, only to become vastly more complicated before hot dog hits bun, so to speak. What woman would settle for an illiterate man with no money and little social standing? If you get married, or have kids, you can pretty much kiss your ass goodbye.
Anyway, I just try to present what I’ve learned and experienced in the most authentic way possible, so hopefully others can think about Japan in a well-rounded manner.” This article is an insightful and slightly controversial follow-up to “Is Dating Japanese Women Really That Easy? First of all, understand that very few Japanese women are interested in dating men of other races. Of course, if you hang around in gaijin bars, then yeah, you’ll meet the one-percent of “Japanese chicks who study English.” And they’ll come equipped with tons of stereotypical ideas about white, black, and miscellaneous brown people. Don’t forget to mention your manga collection and the fact you’re a yellow belt in karate. So when you initially meet someone new, you’re already pre-defined as “a foreigner,” someone whose skin color, clothing, habits, and beliefs places them instantly outside of the social order. Or are you just going to peace out back to Canada and live with your mom after a couple of years? Case in point, I ran in my buddy Tim-Bob the other day, having beers in a gaijin bar.
And you’ll have kids for sure, because that cements the argument. Japanese people value working ridiculously hard, and they’ll expect you to do the same. Seems like you’d have no problem if you were willing to A) Settle for anything that walks, and B) Plan interesting activities for your loved one to enjoy, do virtually all of the talking, and pretend to find him infinitely fascinating. That’s some of what dating a Japanese woman entails.
So now your wife’s at home every day, washing the sheets, scrubbing the bathtub, and cooking meals, which sounds all hunky dory, except that she’s going to require the same amount of effort from you. The difference is that men will put forth whatever effort necessary, and settle for a woman who’s boring, poorly educated, unemployed, even unattractive, so long as it results in some sex.
Foreigners occupy a space similar to that of gays in America: a group viewed as not really “normal,” with values and behaviors outside of the mainstream, but also thought of as flamboyant and entertaining.
Everybody loves them when they’re up on stage or out on parade.
And all right, maybe if you’re drunk enough, you might try sleeping with “one of them,” just to see what it’s like. First of all, this is an article from a guy’s perspective.
That seemed to be the right answer, and we abandoned playing pool in favor of her apartment, which really made me regret not answering the witch question differently. Even the ones who’ll endure it seem determined to lie there like slabs of tuna and wait for you to finish.
A few months later – and okay, I know this is kind of a theme, but that’s just how things worked out – I met this girl in a bar in Shinjuku and we ended up in a love hotel. If you want a vivacious woman who takes an active role in lovemaking then, I dunno, maybe go to Brazil or something, but definitely not Japan.