Look dating partner

Then, take some words that come to mind when looking at your thoughts and create a 'non-negotiable' list, one that you can reference when starting to date someone new.

Revisit and adjust as you continue to grow.”If you're struggling to think of what qualities are important to you or who you'd be compatible with, try an online quiz to kick things off. Family, spirituality, or a healthy lifestyle perhaps?

Over time, your journal will become a fascinating blueprint that may reveal exactly what you're looking for.”Self-care coach Carley Schweet says journaling also comes in handy when figuring out your values and dealbreakers.

“When it comes to finding what you're looking for in dating, it's important to first know what qualities you value and have a level of standard for — in both yourself and in others," Schweet tells Bustle."To help figure that out, I love to encourage asking some simple questions and writing your answers down in a journal.

Do you enjoy dinner with your family at least once a week?

If so, you should be with someone who supports your desires and needs,” dating expert Lori Bizzoco tells Bustle.

I've found it's best to do this exercise in a calm and relaxed state of mind.

Do I feel better about myself when I am with this person?“There isn’t a class in school on how to express our needs, and there’s also a huge cultural shame around women asking for what they need — we’re afraid to come off 'selfish,' 'needy,' 'bitchy,' or 'aggressive.' The reality is that if we don’t ask for what we need from our partners, they are never going to know, and not going to be able to give it to you."If you've ever continued to date someone you were on the fence about, in hopes you'd eventually come around to liking them because they're someone you "should" be with, there's a good reason why."Women are told by parents, society, their own negative self-talk, etc., that they must fit some mold rather than lead with their own preferences,” life coach and relationship expert Diana Mitchem tells Bustle. There is no need to feel guilty when you are personally clear about the kind of person with whom you are looking to connect."So, in order to get past these hurdles and find clarity in exactly what you're looking for, here are 17 ways to figure out what your exact needs in dating are, according to experts.” relationship coach Rosalind Sedacca tells Bustle. "Start with getting clarity on how do you want to feel," Ponaman says.She says it eliminates the focus on factors that really aren't important to a relationship, like someone's height or profession. "Then ask yourself some empowering questions, such as, why is it important for me to feel this way?

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As psychotherapist Alison Pelz tells Bustle, women who ask for what they want are often labeled as abrasive in our culture.

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